This will be my last posting. I started this blog to post pictures for family and friends, but have found that facebook is more convenient for that. I also wanted my kids to have another opportunity for composition, but have found they prefer to practice their writing in private or emailing friends... I would too. I did want to share Nathan's birth story though, as I've so enjoyed reading my friends' blogs and their journeys through pregnancy, adoption and embryo adoption.
Every pregnancy and every delivery is different. Nathan's was no exception. This pregnancy was the hardest of the five... perhaps because of my age or the responsibilities at home, perhaps because of the symptoms and events. I had skin cancer removed from my forehead during this pregnancy and carpel tunnel syndrome that made sleeping a challenge for the last few months. All of this lead to some very serious doubts about how able I am to carry another pregnancy and care for another newborn. I had many discussions with God about this, asking him to replace my worries with joy and holding on to the hope that those thoughts would all disappear the moment this baby and I could finally see each other face to face.
I am very, very thankful that God healed the carpel tunnel from my wrists within hours after the birth, and that Nathan has been a great sleeper, I've had four and five hour stretches of sleep for the first time in months and feel like I am finally recovering! So, that said, here's his story...
Nathan took his time decided to come into the world. For the first time I had stop and go contractions, wondering for about 36 hours whether or not I'd be heading to the hospital soon and knowing that once it picked up I probably wouldn't have much time (this being my 5th baby and all). So, we just went on baby watch and kept everything else normal. I woke up Saturday morning thinking I was in labor, but after a little breakfast (toast) and walking around, felt like I wasn't, so Dad and I went to Home Depot and spent a whole bunch of money on closet organizers that he would install in the kids rooms during the week that he and Mom would spend with us. By the time we got home from that event, contractions were ten minutes apart. I ate more toast and went to lie down. After another 1 1/2 hours of contractions, I called L and D to let them know what was up. They had me call the Dr on call who told me I should probably head in so I could get me strep B antibiotics in. So, I zipped up my suitcase and did a few tasks. That promptly put an end to contractions again. So, Mom and I went for a cold, windy walk. Nothing. At supper, I ate a little and went to lie down. Contractions again, still 10 minutes apart. We started timing them then, with Jonah and Isaiah hovering, concerned that everything was going OK, asking "Are you having another retraction, Mom?" :)
Ron and I headed to the hospital at midnight. Contractions still 10 minutes apart, but getting stronger. I got hooked up to the IV for a dose of antibiotics (ouch), the doula showed up and started helping out. By now, the pain in my lower back was ramping up and she applied counter pressure to my back while Ron applied pressure with his thumbs to the palm of my hand. There is a pressure point there that I learned about before Aaron's labor. Very helpful!
By 1:30, we were done with the IV and I was ready to ramp up the pain relief. My water had not broken yet, so I was able to use the labor tub. (This was one of my specific prayers about this delivery, thanks to God for providing that relief) The tub is huge, big enough for Ron and me to float in. (he brought his swim trunks, no n@kid daddies in L and D, please) I had thought that he would need to provide counter pressure on my back in the tub, but floating in the hot water was all I needed. Amazing. Labor pain was cut in half as I floated away, sleeping in between contractions, leaning against Ron and sucking ice chips thinking "So, this is what it feels like in the womb"). If I'd have known how amazing that is, I would have sought out a water birth. Oh well.
Getting out of the tub was. not. fun. My abdomen muscles cramped up and screamed at me not to move. I s-l-o-w-l-y got out and into a wheel chair to head back to my room for a second dose of antibiotics. Back pain kicked in again and I was fighting to stay calm. I looked for focal points, Ron suggested I try breathing "hee-hee hoo" I remember saying, "I hate hee-hee hoo!" We tried the birth ball, no go. She asked what I wanted to do. I of course wanted to get that baby OUT, so I told her. They checked me at 7-8 cm. Not what I wanted to hear. But, I knew that I could go from 8 to 10 in a very short time, and that I could help get this going, so I tried the squat on the bed with the birth bar position.. the position that brought both Ella and Aaron into the world. And felt the motion start. Baby coming down, Cervix opening. Screaming pain in my back. Ron sat behind me on the bed pushing on either side of my tail bone. They offered to have the dr. rupture the bag of water. Yes! Please! This is the moment when I counted myself a blithering idiot for not getting an epidural because I'm freeked out by the thought of a needle in my back. I think I was in transition. :)
Though this was the hard part, I still had nice long breaks in between contractions and was able to watch what was going on in the room. (a first for me and another specific answer to prayer) I realized too that the nurse had rehydrated me with "gatorade for my blood" through the IV and that my strength was coming back. (after 36 hours of toast, that was cool). I heard them ask for "Jim" and saw a man come in and stand in the corner behind me. Later I realized that he was the emergency pediatrician and had set up oxygen and other emergency equipment for baby if it was needed. He was behind me and out of sight. Good planning on their part. He quietly left the room after Nathan's birth without uttering a word.
Another of my prayers was that the Dr on call would be the kind of Dr that would allow my body to do the work and not get so hasty that he wanted unnecessary intervention (ie. episiotomy) and would help me to slow down so that I wouldn't tear. He was great, saying things like "If I was pushing a baby out, I wouldn't want to tear either" and "Your body knows what to do. You tell us how you want to do this." I've never heard an OB utter words like that before. So he coached, "Tiny pushes... Beautiful contraction, just beautiful..." Nathan was born with about 9 minutes of contractions and little pushes, I pushed out my biggest baby (8 pounds, 4 ounces) and needed 1 stitch. Thank you Father! He was placed on my belly immediately and stayed there for almost an hour before getting weighed and washed. He took to nursing in about 2 seconds and peed on the scale when they weighed him. Ron and I fell in love again and I remembered why we had decided to do this in the first place. Because life. is. precious.
Now, Not all births go like this, sometimes there are emergencies and losses and I do not believe that God turns his back on those cases or turns a deaf ear to prayers, I know he would have been there for us in that kind of situation too. Pregnancy and Birth bring us to our knees because there is no certain outcome or promise made that all will go smoothly. So, pregnancy and birth bring us to our knees in thankfulness when Mom and Baby come through healthy and happy. I don't think there is any greater gift.
